Real men aren't interested in low-fat recipes and quick-and-easy meals.They never make jam or hors d'oeuvres, and especially not angel food cake. According to author David Bowers, cooking for the real man is an adventure. Making cheese at home and brewing beer in the garage may take weeks or months, but time isn't important. Men need to cook for an audience, so the recipes for paella, gumbo, and jambalaya serve ten hungry guys. Men aren't afraid of fat-Scotch Eggs, Fish and Chips, Fried Cheese
Mashed potato preferences are like sexual preferences. People might not talk about it a lot in public, but their feelings in the matter are really strong. My wife is from the South, where mashed potatoes tend to be smooth, light, and fluffy, whipped with an electric mixer using lots of milk, butter, salt, and enough black pepper to burn a novice's tongue. (This is the kind of mashed potatoes in which one makes a "well" to hold lots of cream-enriched chicken gravy.)
My Irish background, however, has left me favoring densely mashed potatoes that have been briefly smashed with a hand masher, with a dollop of cream and butter heated separately in a saucepan. So I guess I fall on the "lumpy" side of this endless debate. Over time, however, my wife and I have hit a happy medium in terms of mashed potatoes. With some of her variations and some of mine (the most important being to heat the milk first), we've created what I think are perfectly amazing mashed potatoes.
Makes 3 to 4 Servings
8 medium yellow or white potatoes, peeled and quartered
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1 cup half-and-half (or milk)
2 tablespoons butter (or more to taste)
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Put the potatoes in a large heavy pan and add cold water to cover (don't ever put hot water on your raw potatoes; it makes them gluey). Add 1 teaspoon of the salt and bring to a boil over medium heat. Boil for 15 to 20 minutes, or until the potatoes can be pierced easily with a knife. Drain the potatoes and mash them with a hand masher or ricer. Put a lid on the pot to keep them warm.
In a small saucepan, bring the half-and-half to a boil over medium-high heat, stir in the 2 tablespoons butter, and turn off the heat. Add the hot half-and-half to the potatoes, a little at a time, whipping vigorously with a fork until the potatoes are fluffy. Season with the remaining 1/2 teaspoon of salt and the pepper. If desired, plop another few tablespoons of butter on top of the potatoes, either in the pan or the serving bowl, to melt down the sides.
Variations: Pumped Up and Mashed
I don't have a problem with flavored potatoes, and I think diehard purists lose out when they insist on untainted spuds. (You know, I like pie, but then I also like pie with ice cream and sometimes with cheese.) Just a few simple things can completely change the character of mashed potatoes and make them into a really powerful dish. Try these variations when using the Perfectly Amazing recipe.
Champ An Irish culinary gem. Trust me. Add 1 cup chopped scallions to the cold half-and-half before bringing to a boil.
Colcannon Another Irish classic. Clean and remove the tough ribs from 1 pound kale (or savoy cabbage in a pinch). Slice the kale in ribbons and drop into boiling salted water. Cook until tender, about 15 minutes. Prepare the potatoes as for Champ (above) with scallions, then stir into the cooked kale. Mound each serving high on a plate and make a well in the center. Fill the well with melted butter and dip each forkful in butter as you eat.
Roasted Garlic Mashed Potatoes Cut the bottom off an entire head of garlic and place on a sheet of aluminum foil. Drizzle with olive oil and twist the foil shut over the garlic. Bake in a 325 degree F oven until the garlic is very soft, about 1 hour. Squeeze the garlic out of each clove into the hot half-and-half before whipping it into the potatoes.
Ancho Mashed Potatoes Soak dried ancho chiles in hot water for 30 minutes. Remove the stems and seeds and chop coarsely. Add to the cold half-and-half before boiling. Don't add black pepper. Caramba, lads!
Souped-Up Celeriac Spuds Celeric is a big ugly root vegetable, something like a mutant hairy white beet with tentacles hanging off. It's also called celery root or knob celery, and it's a pain to peel but worth every creamy bite. The rich, elusive flavor adds a touch of class to the humble spud. Peel as much of the hairy skin and tentacles as you can off 2 medium-size roots, chop into 2-inch chunks, and boil in salted water to cover, separately from the potatoes, until tender, about 10 minutes. Add to the cooked potatoes before mashing. Increase half-and-half by 1/2 cup.
Turbo Turnips and Mashed Potatoes You might think you hate turnips, but wait till you taste the buttery flavor and milk peppery bite they add to spuds. Peel 1 large or 2 to 3 small turnips, cut into 2-inch chunks, and cook in salted water to cover, separately from the potatoes until tender, about 15 minutes. Add to the cooked potatoes before mashing.
Basil Blast Mashed Potatoes Stay with me here. Wash and dry 2 cups fresh basil leaves, and place in a food processor or blender with 1/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil, 2 tablespoons pine nuts or walnuts, 1 garlic clove, and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Blend well and whip into mashed potatoes with a fork just after incorporating the half-and-half. Leave out the butter. These potatoes are disconcertingly bright green, and they taste incredible with grilled meat in the summer.
Wasabi Mashed Potatoes My friend Mike Metens makes these mildly green mashed potatoes with wasabi, the potent Japanese paste used with sushi. Wasabi is available either in paste form or in powder that can be made into a paste. Blend a couple tablespoons of the bright green wasabi paste into the hot milk before whipping into potatoes.
Uses for Leftover Mashed Potatoes
Potato Rolls Combine 1/4 cup warm water with 1 tablespoon sugar and 2 packages active dry yeast in a small bowl. Stir and set aside. In a large bowl, mix 1 cup buttermilk with 1 cup mashed potatoes, 1/4 cup melted butter, 1 large egg, 1 tablespoon sugar, and 1 teaspoon salt. Stir well and add the yeast mixture and 1 cup all-purpose flour. Work in another 3 cups flour, 1 cup at a time, until the dough is stiff enough to knead. Knead for 4 to 5 minutes on a lightly floured surface until the dough is smooth and elastic. Turn the dough into a lightly oiled bowl, cover, and let rise for an hour, until the dough doubles in size.
Grease 24 muffin tins. Punch the dough down gently and push out all the air bubbles with your palm. Pinch off small pieces of dough to form 1-inch balls. Put 3 dough balls in each muffin cup until all the dough is used, cover, and let rise for 30 to 40 minutes. Bake in a preheated 350 degree F oven for 10 to 15 minutes, until browned. Brush the rolls with melted butter as soon as you remove them from the oven. Serve warm.
Potato-Vegetable Cakes Add 1 beaten large egg to 2 to 3 cups leftover mashed potatoes. Add salt, pepper, a couple tablespoons finely minced onion, and 1 cup chopped cooked leftover vegetables: green beans, spinach, cabbage, carrots, peas, broccoli, cauliflower. Form little cakes about 2 inches in diameter and 1/2 inch thick, roll in bread crumbs, and fry in 1/4 inch vegetable oil until the outsides are crispy and brown. Serve immediately.
